So, was just on the phone with Albert. Apparently everybody’s favourite syphilis-addled tyrannical dictator has just declared war on the rest of Africa.
Well, the man’s completely out of his tree, so I don’t think it’s actually impossible.
I just really, really don’t want it to be true. Because if for-real war breaks out in Zim-against-the-world, South Africa will be standing bang behind old Mad Bob. Because they were all terrorists together in the war against colonialism/imperialism/apartheid, and once you’re brothers in the Struggle you’re brothers for life. And it doesn’t matter that the only difference between a freedom fighter and a terrorist is that freedom fighters have already won – because here at the arse end of Africa, the terrorists have all won. And they’re sitting in positions of power remembering the good old days when they could necklace people for telling the truth about them.
Do you know what necklacing is, by the way?
They put a car tyre around your body. They fill it with gasoline. And then they light you on fire, and turn up the music so they don’t have to listen to you scream.
If you’re a man, that is. Only then do you get off that easily
If you’re a woman, you can expect to be raped a few times before they actually get around to the tyre part. Like Maki Skosana, who was still a child when they forced broken glass into her vagina and set her on fire.
And these are the people who run the country, who decide whether we go to war or not. People longing for the glory days of murder and mayhem…
People who believe, whacked-out as it may sound, that Mugabe is actually an okay sort of guy with some good ideas – they’re even adopting some of his land reform practices here! The same land reform practices that saw white farmers murdered, milliions of dollars worth of crops destroyed and the people of Zimbabwe set on a downward spiral of opppression, starvation and abuse. Brilliant, right?
